Move Over Titanic, Hello My New Favorite Movie

“I believe that all wisdom consists in caring immensely for a few right things, and not caring a straw about the rest.” John Buchan

It’s been 10 years since Titanic hit the movie theaters. At the time, I was 24 years old and I’m gonna be very honest with you…I saw it 8 times in the theaters. Along with all the weeping teenage girls, there I sat drawn to the amazing love story and moving special effects. In the 10 years since, I’d yet to cry in a movie. Until this past Sunday…

Cinema Paradiso is a 1990 movie filmed in the timeless architecture of Sicily. I sat there watching the DVD and waiting for something to happen…some explosion or abduction or defining event. But rather, the movie sets up the landscape and day-to-day routines of the main character, Toto. Then Toto leaves his little Sicilian town and returns many years later to find the people and many of his favorite childhood spots to be aged and rundown. Upon his return, I started crying like a baby and I didn’t know why.

After some reflection, I believe we all have eras in our lives. Eras are defined by schools we go to, or homes we live in, or relationships we experience. We tend to put those eras to rest; but every so often, a memory triggers an entire era to rise thru a crack in the mind and explode to the surface. We suddenly recall that era’s daily routines and quirky monuments and stunning vistas. Toto’s return to a past era brought me back…way back. Deep and focused recollection of the past can be an emotional process.

If you think about your current era, so much focus is placed on the little things we do to get thru the day….who you have to email, who you need to call back, where you need to be by a certain time. While the little things take up so much of our day, we just don’t remember that stuff. What we remember are the subtleties, landscapes, and backdrops that define an era. To spend too much time obsessing about the little things prevents us from absorbing the more important stuff.

Here are some tips so that can have a richer experience and form greater memories of your current era:

1. Quirks

We tend to remember the odd little quirks of our daily routines. I recall one era from my life in the northern California town of San Rafael. I’d spend afternoons cutting up tube socks to try and make baseball stirrups; or watching my little brother chase lizards at the top of our street; or this neverending giant can of tootsie rolls that sat on my dresser. Pay close attention to the little things that frustrate you, or entertain you, or warm your heart. It’s those little things that distract you from the daily bump ‘n grin. And it's those little things you'll look back on so fondly.

“Certain flaws are necessary for the whole. It would seem strange if old friends lacked certain quirks.” –Goethe

2. Landscapes

The beautiful parts of your everyday landscape find a permanent place in your memory. As a 6 year old, I remember this one view of San Rafael from my backyard. And I’ll never forget Camelback Mountain smack in the middle of Phoenix; or this amazing Redwood sprouting of my neighborhood in Encino. Every so often, stop and take notice of what you consider to be pretty on your drive to work, or your walk around the block. The natural elements have a way of planting fertile seeds in the depths of your mind.

“Landscapes have a language of their own, expressing the soul of the things, lofty or humble, which constitute them, from the mighty peaks to the smallest of the tiny flowers hidden in the meadow's grass” -Anonymous

3. Meals

There’s something powerful about your favorite meal whether it’s home-cooked or from a local diner. I’ll never forget my grandpa’s gnocchi or my mom’s blueberry cobbler. You can lose yourself in a plate of deliciousness. Be aware of your favorite dishes and truly savor them because a wonderful bite of food can serve is a gateway to a timeless space in your mind.

“Food has replaced sex in my life. Now I can’t even get into my own pants.” Anonymous

• I Want You Erykah Badu
• Mr. Big Stuff Jean Knight
• Fast Car Wyclef Jean
• Get Back The Beatles
• Me and Bobby McGee Janis Joplin
• Summer, Highland Falls Billy Joel
• Million Voices Wyclef Jean
• The 59th Street Bridge Song (Feelin' Groovy) Simon & Garfunkel
• Lover Lay Down Dave Matthews Band
• Marry Song Band Of Horses
• Cinema Paradiso Ennio Morricone